Time for a new hobby? Have you considered dildo play? ZINI's "Perfect body" features a very manageable 6.8 insertable inches and slender silicone shaft, amped up with raised veins and a seriously pronounced head. Step aside, stamp collecting.
At the base is a lovely set of balls, sat atop a strong suction cup that attaches to any smooth surface with limpet-like insistence. Pair it with your headboard for stunning sensations aplenty or stick it in a strap-on dildo and get your lover involved.
You, a realistic dildo and an evening in... all that's missing is a squeeze of water-based lubricant to take pleasure to its apex.